I’m Elliot Roger and So are You, Dude

“Underneath that stereotype is homophobia, of course, and underneath that homophobia, of course, is a hatred of women — of being a woman, of being womanly, of being soft, affectionate, and of being god no EMPATHETIC — that keep men from being well-rounded, decent, complete people.”

Con Gusto

barth polaroidI’ve been trying to talk to men about rape and sexuality for about 23 years now. It’s a conversation that comes and goes, at best, but it seems to be coming back right now, with Elliot Roger’s rampage and how we should deal with it, “in the news.”

I worked with Men Stopping Rape in Madison many many years ago, wrote articles for the group’s newsletter about Axl Rose coming out as an abuse survivor, about Tailhook, how we needed more men talking about our role in the rape epidemic, child/spousal abuse, behavior that supports both, and organizing brother’s circles in the Madison co-ops with great guys. It was the early 90’s men’s movement, and in Madison, ever the soap bubble within soap bubbles, the point was to create “safe spaces” where men could talk to each other about their experiences with sexism, rape supportive behavior, their own abuse or…

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